The ‘Be Careful’ Conundrum
Picture this: It’s a sunny afternoon, and your child is standing at the edge of the playground, eying the monkey bars with a mix of excitement and uncertainty. You’re tempted to shout out, “Be careful!” But hold on, what if there’s a better way to approach this? Today, let’s chat about the magic that unfolds when we encourage risky play and how we can support our kids without stifling their adventurous spirits.
We’ve all been there – watching our kids navigate the world with curiosity and fearlessness. It’s a natural instinct to want to protect them from any potential harm. But guess what? The phrase “be careful” often translates to “don’t try that, it’s too dangerous.” As parents, we want to create a safe environment, but we also want our kids to grow into confident individuals who can handle challenges.
I remember the time when my oldest, Jack (around 2years old), decided to climb the rope tower at Avoca playground. I’ll admit, my heart skipped a beat, and I spotted him the whole way. But you know what? He made it up there, one step at a time, his face glowing with triumph. The thing is, when we allow our kids to engage in risky play, we’re handing them the gift of learning. They learn to assess risks, make decisions, and test their own boundaries. These experiences aren’t just about physical prowess; they’re building blocks for emotional resilience too. Jack has continued to show us he is super capable at climbing all sorts of things, and you know what? He hardly ever has an accident, since we have allowed him to practice his skills and learn how to move his body without assistance, he has built excellent gross motor skills.
The Art of Empowerment
Instead of stifling their urge to explore, let’s empower our kids with better phrases than “be careful.” When your little one is tackling the jungle gym, you could say, “I see you’re being mindful of your balance – that’s awesome!” When they’re climbing a rock, you might ask, “What’s your plan to get down safely?” These words show that you believe in their capabilities while still promoting safety awareness. Some other phrases you could use are: “I know you’re strong enough to figure this out.” or offer support by saying: “How can I support you in this?” or .“Take your time and think it through.”
Sometimes, it’s best to just pause and count to 10 before jumping in. If, after those 10 seconds, you still feel like you need to say or do something, opt for supportive words rather than cautionary ones. Kids pick up on our worries, which can make them more anxious and even prone to accidents. When children are trying out new, risky stuff, it’s quite distracting to hear adults repeatedly shouting, “Be careful!” In fact, it often disrupts their focus and can lead to falls.
Bumps, Bruises, and Life Lessons
When my eldest, Jack, decided he wanted to learn how to skateboard, I knew it was bound to be an adventure. Yes, he ended up with a scraped knee, but he also ended up with a story of perseverance. Risky play isn’t about eliminating all bumps and bruises; it’s about letting our kids learn through experience. These minor setbacks teach them to bounce back and find solutions – skills that will serve them well in adulthood.
Finding the Balance
I’ll be the first to admit that finding the balance between allowing risky play and ensuring safety is no easy feat. We’re not sending our kids out into the wild without a care in the world. It’s about observing, guiding, and stepping in only when necessary. And remember, it’s okay to have those heart-pounding moments; they’re a testament to the depth of our love for our kids.
So, fellow parents, let’s embrace the messy, adventurous journey of childhood. Let’s encourage our kids to climb a little higher, jump a little farther, and explore a little deeper. Let’s replace “be careful” with words that uplift and support their courage. Let’s watch as they stumble, soar, and grow into remarkable individuals who aren’t afraid to face challenges head-on.
Here’s to scraped knees, victorious grins, and the wonderful world of risky play.